iBust Myths — iRewatch iCarly

iLike Jake

Episode four brings Natalie and Circe to discuss some hot & steamy Seddie moments, the cult of Cuttlefish, and, of course, AUSTIN BUTLER on iCarly as THE Jake Krandle.

iLike Jake

Jake Krandle (Austin Butler), one of the cutest boys at Ridgeway Middle School breaks up with his girlfriend, and all the girls at school want a piece of him. Carly thinks she’ll get just that when she invites him on her web-show to perform some songs he wrote. But during a rehearsal, Jake is found to be a horrible singer, and Carly has to struggle to convince an already jealous Freddie to digitally enhance his voice.

Drink Counter

Nat

Circe

Toil and Trouble

Circe did, in fact, have to take a 30 minute power nap before recording.

Sam Being Toxic

2

Gratuitous Foot Shots

N/A

Spencer Taking His Pants Off Infront His Little Sister

N/A

Ratio of Shirtless Gibby to Talking Gibby (in seconds)

N/A

Sexual Innuendo

5

Our Notes

iLike Jake

iRewatch iCarly Episode 4

Episode Title: iLike Jake

Season 1 Ep 4

Release Date: Sept. 22, 2007

Director: Steve Hoefer (Victorious, iCarly, Zoey 101)

Writer(s): Dan Scheider (more like Dan Predator)

iCarly Episode Synopsis: Carly has a crush on a boy named Jake and invites him to perform a song on iCarly, but quickly realizes he cannot fucking sing.

Cold Open

1. Cold Open - School
  1. Sam and Carly are at their lockers and Sam says “you know what I hate?” and Carly says “Mornings?” and Sam is like yup
    1. Imp at the end b/c the same phrase gets repeated (don’t spoil that yet tho)
    2. SAM is on time to school which iThought Was Strange.
    3. Sam is opening her locker but Carly is confused since that isnt her normal locker, sam opens her locker to show Carly the poster of herself pointing with the caption MY LOCKER.
      1. The photos within sam’s locker
        There’s a few pictures in sam’s locker besides her poster, we can only really see two right now BUT the two we can see are two of the band members from Fall out Boy (andy hurley in bottom right and joe trohman in top left)
      2. BUT THIS IS THE LOCKER SHE HAD IN THE LAST EPISODE?
        In the last ep it was her locker, so this is actually because the show was produced in a different order than what it was aired as, that’s why the locker jump doesnt make sense since we think it’s her locker based on the last ep (iDream of Dance), so the order netflix has it in is the production order which has the locker situation without the jump
    4. Carly asks how this happened and Sam explains that she traded lockers with Arthur Gradstein and Carly is shocked saying that she doesn’t know why he would want her locker since it’s in between the two big sweaty wrestlers that fight all the time to which Sam explains that he didn't so she made Freddie take her locker and Arthur took Freddie’s

SAM TOXIC COUNTER: 1

1. 1. 1. Why is Freddie allowing this ?????
    2. Comment about arthur gradstein:
      1. Arthur Gradstein is a writer for iCarly

Act I

in 2021.

HALLWAY

1. Sam and Carly are at the top of the stairs lurking over Jake at the bottom of the stairs which is the first glimpse we get of Jake
  1. JAKE IS AUSTIN BUTLER .. LIKE VANESSA HUDGEN BF AUSTIN BUTLER
  2. Most famously known for his role as Vanessa Hudges boyfriend
  3. The Carrie Diary’s, Zoey 101, Hannah Montana, Aliens in the Attic, but recent upgraded himself out of children’s content and into the Tarantino film, Once Upon A Time In Hollywood
    1. I got cyber bullied on Tiktok for calling Quentin Taratino ugly… it’s a dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it.
  4. HE’S ALSO A LEO <3 represent
2. CARLY “Oh my God, he’s so hot I wanna bake cookies on him”
  SAM “I’d eat those cookies”
  1. ????????? Sounds like a 3some 2 ME
  2. SEXUAL INNUENDO: 2
3. Carly is freaking out because she doesn't know what to go say to him and Sam says that she should apologize for throwing at apple at him and Carly is confused but Sam grabs the apple from her and chucks it and hits Jake in the head to which he just says “ow.” and looks around
  1. Carly goes down and is talking to him and says that “apples can be slippery, dang fuji” (laugh track WILDIN)
  2. Jake says “Oh you’re carly shay right” and shes like uhhh how do you know my name? And then he reveals that he's a huge fan of the show and that he feels like he’s talking to a celeb to which Carly is clearly here for and then invites him over to see where they shoot the show
  3. He is randomly interested in them hanging out
    1. Using her for clout.

Act II

Act II

Shay Apt

1. 1. 1. Spencer made a plaster sculpture of himself but it’s missing the head
      1. Carly and him are going to splatter paint the sculpture so theyre both wearing shitty clothes
        Spencer’s outfit Dane cook realness.
        Carly is dressed like a Lesbian from the late 90’s
      2. So they start to dip their hands into the paint and then spencer realizes he wants to turn some jams on so he goes over and turns the boombox on with his ass …
        H O W
        He clearly has a dump truck that’s how
      3. They start splattering and spencer tells carly she’s “the splatter master”
        He’s genuinely such a good parental figure…. He’s so supportive.
      4. when all of a sudden the doorbell rings, carly answers it and it’s jake .. oh no … carly freaks out and slams the door in his face and runs away, then runs back and tells him to wait there and slams the door in his face again
        Doorbell comment
        There isn’t a doorbell outside of their apt, so where is this doorbell coming from
      5. Spencer is like wtf and carly screams that she needs to make herself look attractive
        The “showing up unannounced” might seem rlly rude, but back then before constant contact technology, this was normal.
        Wait, do you remember “calling hours.”

HALLWAY

1. 1. 1. Freddie OF COURSE comes out of his apt and has his arms crossed all tough and macho like and he asks why jake is here
      1. he’s a fucking YIPPE. YIPPYING THRU THE PEEP HOLE
      2. trying to be?? Menacing?? But he’s literally HALF of Jake’s height…
        iWas Wrong!!!!! HES WEARING THE PLATFORM SHOES
      3. The height difference is so stark, this could literally be a father/son duo.
        Austin was 16, Nathan was 15………… THERE IS ONLY A YEAR BETWEEN THEM. A YEAR AND THREE FEET
      4. Jake is being so nice and he responds that he's there to see carly so freddie takes out a whole printed picture of carly from his pocket and shows jake and says here you saw her so now scurry away
        Does he always carry this around? Why is he so fucking WEIRD
        WHY DOES HE HAVE THAT DID HE KNOW HE WOULD USE IT THIS IS SO CREEPY IS IT JUST ALWAYS IN HIS BACK POCKET
        Comment about freddie apt
        This is first time we see freddie’s apt besides just the door, you can see the entryway and just like a plant and some pictures
      5. Carly lets jake in and slams the door in freddies face, to which freddie says “just keep kissing those frogs carly, this prince can wait”
        This is genuinely so creepy and toxic.
        Freddie’s dream is to literally save carly from “toxic men” and be her like knight in shining armor…. It was the same exact idea that he had in the last ep too to “save her”

SHAY APT

1. 1. 1. Carly introduces spencer and jake to each other
    2. Spencer is holding a paint can that is the color “orphan blue” which is the “saddest of all blues”
      1. NOT a real color.
      2. One person on one website posted about it, but the color they claimed was orphan blue was really just “Vivid Blue”
      3. The HTML code 16a9e5
    3. Spencer is asking if they're going to be up there alone
      1. as he should since boys are gross
      2. very normal way. Not weird and possessive
    4. He then tells them that he can come up at any moment like a ninja and throws his hands up and splashes paint in jakes face “on accident”
    5. Carly is embarrassed and grabs a “rag” to clean him off.
      1. I think this is a cum rag reference. Why didn’t she call it a towel.
      2. I LITERALLY THOUGHT THE SAME THING I WAS LIKE WHY A RAG???

SEXUAL INNUENDO: 3

iCARLY SET

1. 1. 1. Jake is like disappointed that the room looks bigger on the internet and carly goes yeah the internet can distort room size
      1. Ok i genuinely laughed at this because it was like a stupid joke about how the camera adds weight and/or distorts things
      2. Also THE LOFT IS FUCKING HUGE why is this boy coming all up in carly’s home and then shitting on it for not being big, when it’s huge? Rude
    2. Jake starts fangirling about the sound remote and ends up hitting the button that plays the song and has the disco ball
      1. Jake asks carly what song it is and then answers his own question (why ask if u already know like stop trying to flex) saying it’s the song brake lights by cuttlefish
      2. Carly FREAKS and is like omg! I thought i was ~unique~ and noone knew that song too
        so they’re…. Indie?
      3. Jake starts to explain as he leans all up on the car prop and triggers the alarm to go off, carly clicks the sound remote and it does the “pew pew” like an actual car
      4. Jake then continues his sentence and tells carly that it was the first song he taught himself on the guitar and then also shares that he sings too
        Of course he does …. Every single guy who looks like him are the guys who carry around their guitars at parties and try to get girls attention by serenading them.. I’m onto you JAKE
      5. Carly is like omg you should totally be on the webshow and perform, he says sure but he has to see what the fans think …. To which he hits the cheering button on the sound remote
        SO CORNYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
        Like, this guy is not that charming, actually he’s kind of rude.
        He invites himself over, sits on the car, the alarm goes off, doesnt take that as a hint that maybe he shouldn’t sit on the car, sits on the car again, drops the fucking remote, lets it slide off the car onto the floor and then instead of picking it up he goes “Uhhhhh it fell on the floor” ???? 10 min i

SEXUAL INNUENDO: 4

SHAY APT

1. 1. 1. Spencer is sitting in the kitchen with this huge ass plaster ball on his head with two tubes sticking out of the top
      1. Ok so I thought it was paper mache and then he said it was plaster and plaster is like more expensive but apparently it takes less time to dry? I’ve never used plaster because i grew up poor and newspaper is free LOL
      2. Sam comes running into the apt and spencer calls out for carly thinking its her, but nope just sam..
        She says no, Carly is upstairs getting r…
        Fully thot she was gunna say getting railed by jake
        Getting ready for icarly
      3. Spencer explains to sam that he has to sit in this mask for 12 hours to make the head for his sculpture and that one tube is for breathing and the other is for food/drink and asks her to pour some coffee into his drink tube before she leaves
      4. Sam pours it into the wrong tube and spencer chokes, almost drowns, and then coffee spews everywhere from his tube

iCARLY SET (set up for webshow)

1. 1. 1. Jake is minding his damn business tuning his guitar and freddie decides he wants to try to start shit for no reason
      1. Freddie goes “so ur an athlete, ur tall, and every girl in school thinks ur hot, now ur a musician….. CAN YOU FLY TOO?”
        Like ok jealous much
        SUS AF FREDDIE…. Bisexual king
      2. Jake is like acctuuually my uncle is a pilot and is teaching me how to fly, freddie just about combusts and runs back to his safe space by the tech equipment

ELEVATOR

1. 1. 1. Sam is asking carly if she’d ever imagined jake would be in love with her and carly is like well he isn’t …. yet *debby ryan*
      1. Carly is putting on lip gloss for the show, this is gunna be a HUGE show, Carly plans to make jake fall in love w her

iCARLY SET (set up for webshow)

1. 1. 1. Freddie is doing mic check by repeating cinnamon bun a ton of times
      1. Random 😛
    2. Sam asks freddie what he’s doing, freddie starts to respond and explain and sam just goes nvm idc

SAM TOXIC COUNTER: 2

1. 1. 1. The gang wants Jake to do a sound check, so Jake prances on up to the mic and tells them he wrote this song specifically for iCarly and starts to sing
      1. The girls are looking longingly at him, their faces soon turn sour as his vocals are miserable, Freddie gets ELATED
        he’s bad, like really bad
        My subtitles said [off-key]
      2. The lyrics to the song he wrote are “You’re so beautiful, i need the world to see, you’re my miracle just take the time that you need, to breath”
        Which, if this song was for CARLY just say it….. Wtf is it a long song to a WEBSHOW?
        Aside from the bad vocals, like the lyrics arent bad, neither is the guitar so…
      3. Jake finishes up and asks how it was and the girls slowly give a thumbs up while trying to force a smile and freddie is clapping excited as fuck “I can’t wait till we go live.”
    2. The girls tell jake to go change into his “singing shirt” to get ready for the show and shoo him into the elevator. Jake gets in and the elevator closes and you can hear him singing super badly in the elevator
    3. Sam says “well i think we know the results of the sound check… horrible?”
      1. SEDDIE in unison “CHECK!”
      2. SEDDIE are like uh yeah this shit is hilarious
        THE way FREDDIE IS SMILING at SAM
        The framing of this shot, Sam and Freddie are paired together against Carly, shoulder to shoulder.
      3. Carly is still mad af and is like what are we gunna do about it!!!
      4. Sam straight up just tells her that he sounded like a “pile of poo” so his ass will not be singing on the show
      5. Carly drags sam away from freddie so she can express her feelings to her bestie and says that she can’t just tell jake he’s too “poo-ish” to be on the show since she likes him and thinks that he likes her and telling him this will ruin everything, but they both agree that embarrassing himself is worse
    4. Carly has an idea - the elevator!
      1. Sam is like ah yes of course, we’ll push him down the elevator shaft
      2. Freddie chimes in saying he’ll do it
        He has one in unison moment with sam and all of a sudden he’s ready to murder someone
        MINDS BE MELDING
      3. Carly is like guys chill we are nOT going to push the hOTTEST GUY IN SEATTLE down an elevator shaft
    5. Instead, they decide to trap him in the elevator to not hurt his feelings
      1. Freddie wants to “trap him and his feelings”
        But also, if this did work wouldnt he just wanna be on next week?

SHAY APT

1. 1. The girls convince jake to take the elevator by telling him he’ll sweat through his singing shirt
    1. And then they convince him that he needs to go in the elevator alone and they need to stay downstairs the blow their noses
    2. And then they VIOLENTLY and obviously fakely blow their noses
      1. I would never tell a boy i liked that i needed to blow my nose. Blowing your nose is one of the most embarrassing things a school girl can do.
  2. The girls scream and run to switch off the elevator power
    1. Which… would it be that easy?
      1. Yes you just flip the breaker switch
    2. They’re screaming with him thru the wall, wouldn’t he have heard them devising their plan?
      1. He’s hot and dumb <3 a HIMBO
  3. Jake is confused why the elevator stops and the girls assure him it’ll be working again soon and leave since they think their master plan worked and he’s stuck
  4. The phone rings, spencer goes to get it, but since he still has his plaster head on he can’t see shit so he trips and falls over the couch and onto the floor and just lays there while the phone continues to ring

Act III

Act III

iCARLY SET (set up for webshow)

1. 1. 1. Freddie asks if jake is trapped and sam responds “like a monkey in a box”
      1. Freddie “why would a monkey be in a box?”
      2. Sam “what do you think i am? Some kind of monkey expert?”
      3. Freddie “BUT-”
        This banter is so cute.
    2. Show time is coming up and the girls decide that they’re going to improv (IMPROV legends) during the time jake was supposed to be singing and say something funny
      1. Sam says “oh like freddie’s haircut”
      2. Freddie “i heard that!”
      3. Sam “you were supposed to”
        SO FLIRTYYYYYYYYYYY they’re in love that’s it it’s over!
        Baby u only hate him bc he loves Carly n not u….
    3. OUT OF NOWHERE jake prys himself out of the elevator and everyone is just fucking shocked as to how he did this
      1. Jake tells them that he found an emergency door and squeezed through it and then got himself out…….
        THIS IS SO DANGEROUS
        I KNOWWW carly is like ok daddy right now
    4. He says that the reason why he put his life at risk to get out of the elevator is because he doesnt want to disappoint his grandma who went out and bought her first computer to watch him since she has never heard him sing
      1. He then says that she chose to buy this computer instead of buying herself a new foot
        Ok dan schnieder
      2. Sam asks what happened to the other foot (which is rude) and he tells them that he doesn’t like to talk about it but she had a cat that she forgot to feed ….. Insinuating the cat ate the foot?
      3. Commentary on health care…………… leftism legends
    5. 6 Min till LIVE
      1. F O R WHOM
      2. The girls say they’re going to go check the lighting in the hallway clearly trying to get freddie to play along to go talk shit but since he is a man aka an idiot he doesnt get the hint
        So sam SHOVES freddie into the hallway
        Freddie is trying so hard to give some resistance to her pushing him but sam just bulldozes him

HALLWAY

1. 1. 1. Carly says they have to let him sing to not disappoint “gammy one foot” and sam says that it would be bad if he did sing because everyone would make fun of him since he’s a pile of poo
      1. Carly doesn’t care since big pop stars can’t sing either and says that they all just fix their voices with computers
      2. Sam is like “well it's too bad we don't know a computer geek who will do anything you ask”
      3. Freddie refuses to help because he doesn't want to turn Mr. Awesome into Mr. Totally Awesome
      4. Carly begs and pleads, so finally freddie decides to use this to use carly’s desperation to his advantage and asks if she would kiss him if he helped her
        CREEEEEP ALERT
        Carly is like HELL NO, so what does Freddie do? I mean he’s a gentleman, so obviously he starts bargaining with her
        Just a little kiss on the lips
        NO
        On the cheek?
        NO
        On the nose?
        NO
        Ok fine i’ll do it
        He literally convinced himself.
        It took her saying no FOUR times for him to agree to help.. What the fuck ok men suck

iCARLY SET (webshow is LIVE)

1. 1. 1. The girls start to say that they have something special for the show and sam jokes and says that they’re going to start punching each other in the face and carly adds on to say that the one with the last tooth wins and then theyre like haha jk 🙂 it’s live music!
      1. Why … would they punch each other in the face ….
      2. Such the toxic friendship where they just joke around beating the shit out of each other because they actually hate each other
    2. Jake comes out and says that he’s going to perform his song “Whatever my love” and dedicates the song to his grammy and says “keep on hopping grandma”
      1. Jake is very camera ready….. Too camera ready
      2. This one footed old lady doesnt have a wheel chair or crutches she just HOPS AROUND.
    3. Jake starts to sing and it’s bad, but freddie is apparently autotuning it so it sounds different to the viewers
      1. Carly is wondering if it’s working since he still sounds like shit to them
      2. Freddie gives her a pair of headphones and we get to hear what the viewers are hearing and it sounds amazing
        HOW IS FREDDIE T PAINING HIM LIVE
        too amazing/crisp ….
        Because it's actually austin butler singing on a separate track just being played here, so no autotune

SHAY APT

1. 1. 1. Spencer is watching iCarly live on the computer (still having the plaster head on of course)
      1. AWWWWW
      2. Spencer get a lil thirsty and wants to drink his punch but instead put his tube into the fishbowl and INHALES the fish and it like slurps
        And all he says is “what flavor punch did I buy?”
        “Didn’t even notice” audio by doja cat”

iCARLY SET (webshow is LIVE)

1. 1. 1. Jake is still singing and carly is so happy that freddie’s autotuning is working that she goes gimme that nose and then grabs freddie’s face and kisses him on the nose
      1. Jake catches a glimpse of the smooch out of the corner of his eye

GRANDMA’S HOUSE

1. 1. 1. Grammy is at her first computer ever and is clapping and screaming “YEES YES THAT’S MY GRANDSON, THAT’S MY JAKEY”
      1. She then stands up and just FALLS over like a log
        Is this ableist?
        Grandma’s house set fun fact
        Fun fact: grandma’s house is the same set as jade’s house in victorious

SCHOOL

1. 1. 1. Carly and sam are walking in and sam goes “ugh i hate mornings, why can’t school start at 2PM”
      1. Same line that started the episode!!!
      2. This happened last episode too with the “Weird” line!
    2. Jake and his ex are MAKING OUT at their locker and of course carly and sam see it and carly is freaking out
      1. Sam says “sorry kiddo”
      2. Carly goes over and talks to him but then the same group of girls that were freaking out in the beginning of the ep interrupt and tell jake how well he sang on the show and tell him to call them
        Miss girls.. If he was not interested in your before he is definitely not interested in you now, he is famous bb
      3. Carly just goes “nice :)” and then brings up how she saw him and his ex swapping spit a few min ago
        So awk i would never confront a man like this
      4. Jake says how his ex watched the show and loved it so now they’re back together
      5. Then he says that it all worked out since he doesn't want to get in between her and freddie
      6. Carly does NOT like that and reiterates that her and freddie are NOT dating
      7. Jake is like yeah well i saw you kiss his nose
      8. Carly again goes WELL WE AREN’T DATING and jake is like yeah ok anyway bye ……….. Thanks for the free clout <3
      9. Carly is now just screaming into the abyss IT WAS JUST A NOSE KISS, IT WAS STRICTLY NASAL
        Sexual… sounds like anal.
        I …. Did not think that but ok go off

Sexual innuendo ? 4?

End Credit Scene

Post Credit Scene

1. Girls just crossing her eyes and moving one eye and then the other and getting really close to the camera???
  1. Little girl can pennywise her eyes.
  2. Thank god no feet.